True Intellectual Freedom

A guest article by Anonímo

I’m a gay guidance counselor and I don’t do anything wrong.

I’ve used my status to do something good for the world. I have to spread the truth against ignorance, bring it to the public school bitches that don’t know any better. I see them gawk at from behind their wrinkling botox and their bifocals, they deserve to be punished for their internalized bigotry.

I’m a gay guidance counselor and I know my feelings are real.

I get paid to put on a show for four hours, I knew theater class in High School was going to be worth something. Tree in the background yesterday, mole for change tomorrow. I used to hate having Subway every day for lunch, but free food honestly makes any job worth it. I hope Jared gets castrated for making us look bad.

I’m a gay guidance counselor and I love to waste people’s time.

I’m against violence, i’m glad there were never any gay terrorists — we’d lose the sympathy momentum we got from Stonewall and the AIDS crisis. Sometimes I wish I lived back then, got to experience what the real dangerous gay was like. I mean, it’s not so bad now. We’re a little more out in the open. I want everybody to meet my husband.

I’m a gay guidance counselor and I want you to feel my pain.

I’m a Mexican too, so the oppression I face in this America is unspeakable. I rose to this position by playing pretend, hetero’s are so stupid. We should stop lobbying for political office, legitimizing gayness in a world that doesn’t want us. Penetrate the public school system like I did. These gringos excused the pitch in my voice for sheer flamboyance. Now they work with my schedule. They work for me.

I’m a gay guidance counselor and I know i’m doing the right thing.

My lessons plans are made up as I go along, the school board is too afraid of me to ask what i’m teaching. I like to make the teachers uncomfortable. I like to make them think of insults and yell them at me while I stand in the center of attention. I like to make them admit they’re racist. I like to make them admit they might be gay. I know they aren’t. They dress too poorly for that.

I’m a gay guidance counselor and i’m going to change the world.

The State has to spend money on something so it looks like they’re making an effort in preparing its workforce for “sensitivity events.” These teachers have to show up to my trainings or else they get write-ups. One day, they’re going to be forced to tell our story, our history. Finally. 

I’m a gay guidance counselor and it’s already too late.

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